Lost in the (W)Hole

Good Heavens it’s been TEN months since I’ve been able to post anything here! If this was a baby I’d be a month overdue!!!

To be honest I rather feel like my name got changed to Alice this past near-year. I got sick and had some MAJOR surgery in February that culminated in a three week stay in the “new” rehab wing inside a nursing facility where I used to work. Talk about panic! I had already spent a grueling week in the hospital but to then find myself in the receiving end of an old work place was nearly more than I could bear.

This was at the hospital. (Oh My!!! That is NOT a bedpan! It is what left of a meal tray!)  I looked awful and felt just as worse. And yes, that is a walker. Used that the week I spent in the hospital. They upgraded me to a cane when I got to rehab.

I actually spent my birthday in rehab. That was a bummer. One of my friends sent me flowers and my grand kids brought me lots of balloons. My daughter also had a BIG canvas made of the kids for me to hang on the wall next to my chair. Believe me, I looked at it every day! AND they brought my dog to visit for my birthday!

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She made herself at home in my blankets! I think I missed her the most….

So now I’m home. I still have to use a cane. Nothing fancy (yet). Found some “old man canes” at a second hand store after using one previously left behind by an ex….that thing was too tall for me anyhow. To help me feel better about the ugly canes I started crocheting handle covers and even tried my hand at making slip-on flowers and leaves. The grands love it and my little neighbor girls are fascinated that my cane wears clothes. 😀

I was told I would have to use a cane the rest of my life. I do believe it. Something connected to this surgery further aggravated the cancer-induced neuropathy. I was severely dropping things and stumbling all over myself. Funny but they taught me to use the cane in my primary hand….which is the one I was always dropping things from! Since I’ve been home I’ve learned to use that cane in either hand depending on how weak my hands are. I shift my weight usually off of the affected foot and leg too.

Oh, in case you are wondering, I had surgery to repair what is called a Recticele. I’m not sure if I have that spelled correctly. I had been passing lots of blood rectally as if I had a faucet turned on. Praise God I didn’t have to have a blood transfusion! But all the same the surgery lasted over 5 hours. It was only supposed to last 30 minutes. It was really super bad. So, once again, I am glad to be alive and am continuing to heal.

So many more things have happened since I came home. Many of which were NOT good for me. The day I came home I had a major meltdown. I am so GLAD the kids didn’t send me BACK to the hospital for mental reasons! They were the CAUSE of it all! More about that the next time. To be honest, I am still trying to heal from that incident. Worst thing to ever have happen to me since cancer and having that surgery. Oh! I forgot to tell ya’ll that I actually wanted to and honestly thought I was going to die about three days after surgery. Never had pain that intense in that manner except one other time in my life. I honestly would NOT wish it on any of my enemies! (Childbirth was NOTHING compared to this pain…).

Slowly climbing back up the (W)hole…rabbit or otherwise.

Oh! While in rehab I watched their GINORMOUS pet rabbits!!! These things were nearly twice the size of my dog!!!

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Just call me “Alice”…..I’m in here somewhere!

Until next time I pray peace and an abundance of blessings on ya’ll!

~ Bonnie

 

 

 

 

 

Timeless Encouragement

cast your bread

Here we are between holidays and I am finding myself cleaning out my emails. Sadly there are a great many pages of unread emails from two years ago! One such email I want to share with you. I find the words of this blogger to be as fresh for me as if she had written them yesterday. There can always be a renewal, a regeneration, if you will, of reading words with a fresh approach. Much like re-reading a well loved book. You always enjoy it and every time you turn a page you find a renewing of the words.

The words of this blogger left me with a realization for my life. I feel so much of the time that I have so very little to share. But when I share with others then we are both enriched and have more than when we started. In compliance with the words of that email I do believe my word for this new year to come is “SHARE”. I must do more sharing in 2015. Much more sharing than I ever have. And that sharing begins here.

Enjoy…..

http://www.faithbarista.com/2013/01/why-you-must-write-when-you-have-very-little-to-offer/#comment-58033